What Goes Up Must Come Down

Amy Sweeney by Amy Sweeney Additional Needs

Amy Sweeney

Amy Sweeney

My name is Amy and I’m mum to Wilson aged 3 and Ava aged 4. Wilson has cerebral palsy affecting all 4 limbs along with CVI but it doesn’t let it st...

It’s true isn’t it, what goes up must come down.

That includes feelings too.

One of my social media friends put a post on recently asking if any other special needs parents ever felt down the day after a good day.

I was like, “Me, me, me!!”

I didn’t think anyone else ever felt like that so never brought it up or mentioned it, I thought it was really silly so I buried those feelings.

But after that post, I wondered how many other parents feel that way?

For example, my son has quadriplegic cerebral palsy so he can’t sit up, stand or walk without any support but recently he’s been doing so well with his sitting positions, he managed to sit on the stairs himself with his big sister and sing and I was SO proud, this is a huge milestone!

We were all on a high that day, laughing and praising Wilson’s amazing achievement of not only being able to balance himself on the step but also doing some actions to a song with his sister!

I couldn’t stop talking about it all day and I took videos too that I shared for everyone to see.

Then the next day I woke up and just felt a bit low and this seems to happen every time after something incredible is achieved.

I’ve been trying to work out why but I haven’t quite come up with an answer yet but I think I’m pretty close.

I think it’s because when something big happens, you’re in the moment and the pride you feel is just like no other and when the next day comes it’s like reality hits you.

Although that milestone was achieved, there’s still that feeling of sadness and guilt that if there were no disabilities involved then your child would be able to do all these things anyway.

I feel bad for even writing that down but it’s true.

Like my example I gave of my son sitting on the step, as incredible as it was (and I’ll not take that away because it really is amazing) he still can’t sit without support, people will see the picture or the video of him sitting and comment how amazing it is that he can do this without support!

But I won’t write down that I wouldn’t be able to leave him, I have to still help him with his balance or he will fall and he still requires support 99% of the time.

I hate being negative and I try my best to see the positive in every situation but I felt like I had to write this down, to let other parents know that they aren’t alone in feeling that awful low after that amazing high.

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