Acquired Bravery
Jodi Shenal
I'm a stay-at-home mom with two amazing children. My son is on the Autism spectrum and my daughter has a rare genetic disorder and multiple disabiliti...
In my twenties, I would have never described myself as BRAVE.
Softspoken and sweet were probably better descriptions of the old me.
Gutsy?
Loud?
Fearless?
Not so much.
Motherhood changed that. Having children with additional needs drastically changed that.
My son and daughter taught me to unbecome consistently soft and agreeable. They taught me a whole other side of life exists that requires resolute bravery.
This life depends on a level of dauntlessness that I never would have thought myself capable of.
The old version of me would have been too timid to speak up in IEP and 504 meetings
She would have been nervous, shying away from demanding more when services were being reduced. She wouldn’t have questioned authority or spoken up when things could have been done a different and better way.
She would have pacified the notion of disputing a doctor’s advice and seeking out other opinions. She would have never imagined arguing with insurance companies and medical equipment providers, for hours on end, and winning.
She would have run and hid at the idea of speaking to large groups of people on topics like rare genetic disorders and legalizing medical cannabis.
She would have believed that school administrators and state legislators always had the very best interests of our most vulnerable at heart.
NOT ANYMORE. That version of me became jaded. She simply doesn’t exist anymore.
My children have taught me that speaking out and standing up for others is our duty. As their mother, educating the world about Autism, Epilepsy, disabilities, and inclusion is my job. A vital part of that job description is loudly advocating for all that they need; for them to be seen. There is no room here for perpetually quiet, reserved and compliant. Never again.
As a mother, I have faced terrifying medical emergencies. The memory of my daughter’s first seizure is forever burned in my brain, and it is the reason for my post-traumatic stress. Even though I always fall apart afterwards, she has taught me the necessity of digging deep each time, to find courage in the scariest moments.
I’m thankful for the backbone that my children have helped me grow and the fortitude they made me acquire. Unconditional, unstoppable, and unyielding love does that. It changes you. It remakes you. For once in my life, and because of them, I can call myself BRAVE.
